I haven't done any work on my papers in the past few days. About two and a half to do by the end of the week. One is 15 pages.

Every day I try to go to bed early, thinking my messed up sleep schedule is what is making me so listless during the day, but even when I take Benadryl I cannot fall asleep until around 4 a.m. Needless to say, this week has really sucked. I broke down a few nights ago, and it must have been so bad that God told Seth to call me because he woke up at 2:30 a.m. the night I was feeling the worst and called. I have felt better since then, as far as handling stress goes. I now know that it is possible to get all of these things done, even if it seems impossible, and have been trying to keep my anxiety levels down.
I slept until 1 pm yesterday and today and even though I am drinking Red Bull right now to try to get ready to write, it isn't having any effect. I feel so tired and lethargic. I don't feel like caring or doing anything, which is terrible because I have so much due this week. I still need to study for my Methods final and I don't understand the class at all.

Anxiety was hurting me. It was making my heart hurt and making me feel like there was no way out. This feeling of not caring about anything, though, is almost worse. I feel no drive.

Sorry this post is so depressing, and the writing so crappy. I thought this post would help me wake up, but it hasn't, really.

Here goes trying to make myself do the write thing (punnnnnnnnnnnnn).

Labels: concentration, finals, focus, insomnia, stress, unhappiness