Writing a paper for film class. Not a hard subject, I'm just having trouble focusing. I put it off all day and now it's due tomorrow and even though I have a lot of time tomorrow to work on it (it's due at 5), I'd really like to just get it over with now and be done with it. I guess I'll write until midnight and then go to sleep. That seems like a good enough plan. I'm already going to be getting only 7 hours of sleep.

Today worship practice before church was kind of difficult. I was having trouble finding the rhythms to the songs and I would keep messing up and stopping on one song. I really hate playing and singing at the same time but it wasn't really a choice tonight. We finally got things worked out so that we sounded okay and I felt ready and everything, but I messed up when we started the first song and everyone took a different rhythm so it sounded like I was off and it wasn't coming back together.

So I stopped playing and said sorry, that I wasn't getting it tonight and said we were just going to sing. It was great. I love playing guitar, but not for worship. I get distracted because I'm either too focused on playing for it to be any fun or I get lost in singing and then mess up on playing. But I love to just sing.

You could feel God in the room tonight and I hadn't felt that in a long time, at least since I started being the guitarist. We didn't harmonize or anything, we just all sang as a group and it felt so raw and real and powerful. I would rather mess up publicly and then give that to God than for everything to go as planned and to feel nothing.

Sometimes God has to let us mess up to get our attention.